Obtained a relationship downside? Jason Godfrey, our resident man skilled, is right here to assist. This month, Jason discusses find out how to focus on the difficulty whenever you and your associate aren’t aligned on having youngsters and the age-old query on whether or not women and men ought to cut up their payments equally.
Q: I would like youngsters some day, however my associate dislikes the concept of being a guardian. I really like every thing else about him and I don’t need to break up with him over only one factor, however it’s one relatively important factor. What ought to I do?
To have a toddler or not is a relatively important factor, and also you’re proper that you need to each be on the identical web page. The important thing factor I learn right here, nevertheless, is that you just stated you need youngsters some day. “Some day” makes me assume you’re not seeking to have youngsters within the subsequent couple of years, which is sweet as a result of it provides him time to maybe change his thoughts.
The choice to have youngsters, particularly for males, can typically be associated to the place they’re financially or of their profession. We ask ourselves, Can I handle a child or am I prepared for one proper now? Perhaps your associate isn’t prepared for slightly one simply but, however who is aware of how he’ll really feel in just a few years. When you’ve got time, wait and discover out.
Q: I’m all for equality of the sexes, however my associate does earn thrice what I make. Ought to we be splitting the payments 50-50 or 3-to-1?
You have to be splitting payments 100-0 in favour of the particular person making thrice what you make! I’m solely partially kidding. I agree about equality of the sexes too, however to me, if somebody can afford to extra simply pay the payments in a relationship, then they most likely ought to. Perhaps this is a matter of how lengthy you two have
been collectively, as a result of on the one hand, possibly he desires to pay the payments, but additionally possibly he desires to be sure that the particular person he’s with isn’t simply staying with him for his bill-paying skill.
I’d preserve splitting issues nevertheless you’re splitting them for now, however as your relationship progresses, I do assume you may have a reasonably first rate case for asking him to select up nearly all of the tabs.
Supply: Her World